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“Sibling Squabbles Are a Big Hot Button for Us”

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On the cusp of summer, ADDitude asked caregivers: What are your trouble spots in managing children during the long school break? How do you overcome these issues? Here’s what they shared:

I take advantage of the morning coolness and plan outdoor activities before the summer sun heats up. One child is very sensitive to heat, so indoor activities take up the afternoon. I allow screen time later in the day. If I allow this too early, I’ve lost them for the rest of the day.”

“All of my kids have ADHD, and they get on each other’s nerves, so separating them as much as possible works best. I schedule activities at different times. When one child is busy, I spend one-on-one time with the other.”

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“We have three kids, two with ADHD and one with AuDHD. We arrange for camps at staggered times, so when they start to get bored, there’s another camp to go to.”

“Both my kids have ADHD. One is inattentive, and one is hyperactive/impulsive. They prefer to be home in the summer instead of at a camp. They have vastly different interests, different ways of handling things, and are at different developmental stages. This is what works for us: giving each some one-on-one time, scheduling family activities and chores to keep them busy, and letting one stay home while the other goes to their grandparents for a day or two.”

“My kids with ADHD get so adept at their school-related and after-school obligations that, come summer, they almost freak out with the overstimulation of all the options available. One child craves fresh and new activities while the other requires routine. Hanging out at a public pool and inviting different friends to come with help. Going to a park with splash zones is good for the child who likes novelty. Going there at the same time helps the child who craves routine.”

Sibling squabbles are a big hot button for us. I have been working with my kids on slowing down, emphasizing belly breathing, and waiting 90 seconds to allow the fight or flight chemicals to clear from their brains. Then, I encourage each to share their perspective while the other silently listens. Then I allow them to collaborate on a solution.”

How to Stop Siblings from Fighting: Next Steps


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